Dear Seniors,
We know from talking to many of you that this is a bittersweet time. In the last newsletter in May we will try to frame for you all that happens - and maybe what to expect - in the crazy few last weeks of the year. This time, though, we want you to know that it would be really normal to have some ambivalent feelings. While you are planning a major shift in your lifestyle, the groups and teams that have been important to you are making plans. Without you! Younger students are registering, finding apartments, reserving rooms... Hey, you used to do that! Lots of people are bugging you about jobs, grad school, your “gap year” (remember we think these are usually “on” experiences)….that’s not new. And you still don’t want to talk about it – although it might be all you think about.
But now Trinity is starting to talk about next year… organizations are starting to talk about next year’s leaders, registration is going to happen without you, you aren’t debating on or off-campus housing because you know you are off… you are not only leaving but getting kicked out of the nest, especially by those underclass “upstarts.”
What can you do? Three things come to mind:
Keep thinking and working on finding your passion and plans for next year -- what you are getting “pulled toward”—because that will help you embrace this transition more than feeling “pushed out.”
Instead of becoming absent or obsolete – think about and work on how you can share your wisdom, leadership, and contributions. Now’s the time to mentor the next seniors and leaders, to help set up individuals and organizations for success as they start next year.
Embrace ambiguity. See it as… delicious?
You are likely becoming more and more aware that this temporary state called college is coming to a close. Perhaps that is really exciting and you feel ready. Perhaps it is eating you up inside. Most likely, it is some combination, and you may even be feeling both things at different times on the same day. This is OK. It means you cared about your experience here and your relationships. It means you have exciting opportunities ahead of you. These things aren't mutually exclusive. Get used to this sense of ambiguity. Maybe even embrace it. Gilda Radner, a comedian, called it “delicious ambiguity.” For you right now, it might not feel delicious – or it’s just starting to feel that way – or you wonder when that will come. As we look back at the final year we each had at Trinity, and especially the final months, we know now how deliciously, awfully, wonderfully, and anxiously ambiguous it was – and how ambiguously, awfully, wonderfully, and anxiously delicious it was. Get ready for both – and more of it. We’ll talk more about that in the next newsletter – and all of the important transition events coming to help.
And remember- we and others are always here to help!
All our best,
Angela Breidenstein & Dave Mansen
Class Marshal & Alumni Sponsor
I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next.
Delicious Ambiguity.
- Gilda Radner
